Joyous Sin...

Recently there is this idea or rather a proposal that I had for God. Why not make Joy a sin? I mean everyone should be miserable as shit. At one moment I thought I have gone completely insane by thinking so. But slowly my idea only make more sense as time passed. I'm not talking about what good does Joy give to you but rather what your Joy give to others?


I mean I have to admit it, there were times when intense feeling of Joy filled me. But it's long gone along with time. During that time, I have to admit that I forget certain people's well being when I was having the time of my life. There is just so much Joy that somehow it clouded my mind preventing me from thinking about those who needs a little attention from me, a pair of ears to listen to their woes. Sadly I was a jerk and I feel ashame of being joyful.


When I think back the only time I ever turn to people is when I needed something; when I was bored, when I needed a ride, when I needed something done that I can't do. You name it. The times of need brought me closer to people and I was able to share with them my misery and they were able to do so as well. I got a chance to listen to them. But I guess I screw it up everytime I have Joy.


I thought this only happen to me. Sadly it happens everywhere. When people are having the time of their lives, they tend to forget a certain someone that just didn't cry out loud enough to catch their attention. Joy is just too loud.


Part of me felt the need to have Joy. Part of me felt that it's slowly poisoning me and everyone else. Just this mix of emotion that makes me can't seem to decide. Maybe one day I would be able to make the decision. Maybe one day you will be able too. Right now I feel like the person crying out loud to my friend. Now I feel how people might have feel when I forget about them for the joyous moments that shrouded and blinded me. Call me crazy for I feel that I want to let go of Joy and lend you my ears. Would you ever do that for me in my time of dire?